For years, I would blindly buy pieces of clothing that I loved the look of and place them lovingly in my wardrobe, never to touch them again. For example, I absolutely love florals, so my wardrobe was full of pretty tops and dresses covered in flowers, that I thought were absolutely adorable – but I never wore them.
In terms of interior design, I’m a florals girl all the way, but for a long time I neglected to consider whether I actually liked dressing in the same style as I like to decorate. I’m very much a cottagecore and grandmacore lover when it comes to interiors, but with fashion I’m far more drawn to the romantic silhouettes of Vivienne Westwood, the more-is-more philosophy of Dolly Parton, and the kitschy femininity of Fran Fine.
Understanding what you like in practice and what you like in principle can be tricky to distinguish, as no one can tell you but you! Hopefully, the steps I’ve outlined in this list can help you as they helped me way back when I decided I wanted to have a more concrete idea of what my personal style was.
1. Stop trying to define your style
I know, this sounds counterintuitive but stay with me! Very few people dress in one style exclusively, and trying to think in terms of ‘Am I Y2K? Am I Cottagecore? Am I Dark Academia?’ just leaves you going around in circles.
The best way to start is by asking yourself these questions:
- What outfits do I like on others?
- What interiors, films, photographs, paintings, etc. am I drawn to?
- What colours keep appearing?
- What textures/materials catch my eye?
- What silhouettes do I find beautiful?
- What details make me think ‘I LOVE that!’
The main focus at this point is to collect before you categorise. Pinterest is a great place to do this! Which leads us to the next step…
2. Create an inspiration collection
Make a Pinterest board, camera roll album or folder and save everything you genuinely like – again, I highly recommend using Pinterest for this purely for ease, but go with whatever works for you.
Don’t worry about whether the images ‘match’ or fit into the same style category – in fact, it’s better if they don’t!
Include outfits, accessories, interiors, hairstyles, makeup, art, photography, architecture, objects — anything that gives you the feeling you’re looking for. The aim here is to uncover your visual instincts, rather than copying somebody else’s aesthetic.
3. Look for the patterns
Now we put our analytical hats on. Look at your collection, and ask ‘What do all these things have in common?’ I don’t necessarily mean every single image, just look for colours, patterns, fabrics, silhouettes, hairstyles, accessories, motifs, and details that appear across the collection.
For example, when looking through, you might find that you consistently are drawn to:
- lace
- faded colours
- fitted silhouettes
- antique-looking jewellery
- floral motifs
- glossy fabrics
- unusual accessories
- slightly messy hair
- old-fashioned details
This is probably the most important step for defining your style!
4. Work out your ‘style ingredients’
This is where we really try to pin down what it is that you love about all the inspiration you’ve collected.
To help, I’ve listed below the main elements of style so you can go through them in blocks to create the collage of your aesthetic:
Colour:
- Colour palette
- Neutral vs brights
- Warm vs cool tones
- Pastels vs deep/rich colours
- Particular colour combinations you love!
Silhouette & fit:
- Fitted, oversized, relaxed or structured
- High-waisted vs low-waisted
- Cropped vs long
- Mini/midi/maxi
- Body-skimming vs flowing
- Defined waist vs straight silhouette
Fabrics & textures:
- Lace, satin, velvet, denim, linen, knitwear, leather, chiffon, cotton, etc.
- Soft vs structured
- Matte vs shiny
- Delicate vs chunky
- Smooth vs textured
Patterns & prints:
- Florals
- Stripes
- Checks
- Polka dots
- Animal prints
- Paisley
- Graphic prints
- Whether you like patterns at all!
Details & embellishments:
- Bows
- Ruffles
- Lace
- Buttons
- Embroidery
- Beading
- Pleats
- Fringing
- Hardware
- Interesting necklines/sleeves
Accessories:
- Jewellery – gold vs silver, chunky vs dainty, minimal or layered…
- Handbags – big carry alls or little purses?
- Shoes – heels, chunky boots, trainers/sneakers, flats, loafers…
- Belts – big and chunky or slim?
- Hair accessories – scrunchies, headbands, claw clips, hair jewellery…
- Sunglasses – big, small, round, square…
- Additional accessories – hats, scarves, gloves, tights…
Proportions & styling – different from the actual silhouette, for example:
- Tiny top + oversized trousers
- Fitted dress + chunky shoes
- Mini skirt + oversized cardigan
- Lots of delicate layers
- One statement piece + otherwise simple outfit
Level of maximalism:
Minimal – simple, clean, restrained, a few details
Moderate – some accessories/details, maybe a statement piece
Maximalist – colour, pattern, texture and accessories layered together
Mood / feeling:
This is probably the trickiest one as it’s so subjective, but try to identify if your style feels:
- Romantic
- Elegant
- Playful
- Sexy
- Whimsical
- Dramatic
- Cool
- Cozy
- Sophisticated
- Nostalgic
- Ethereal
Beauty and Grooming:
It’s not all about the clothes! Consider:
- Hair – volume and curls or silky straight?
- Makeup – classic and chic or fun and colourful?
- Nails – french tips or nail art acrylics?
- Fragrance – floral, amber, woody, fresh?
5. Figure out what you actually enjoy wearing
This is where inspiration meets reality. Something can look absolutely gorgeous on Pinterest and still not be something you necessarily enjoy wearing.
Consider the following questions about the clothes you already own:
What do I reach for constantly?
What do I never wear?
What outfits make me feel most like myself?
What clothes make me feel uncomfortable or self-conscious?
What pieces do I wish I had more of?
Your personal style needs to work on your actual body, lifestyle and comfort level – not just look pretty in a collage!
6. Experiment!
Rather than completely reinventing your wardrobe, just start playing around. Take one element you love and introduce it into an otherwise familiar outfit. For example:
Normal outfit + romantic blouse
Normal outfit + unusual jewellery
Normal outfit + coloured tights
Normal outfit + vintage handbag
This lets you discover which elements genuinely feel like you. Don’t be afraid of outfits that don’t work! They’re useful information and still help you towards your goal 🙂
7. Create your personal style vocabulary
Once you’ve done all this, you should be able to describe your style without relying entirely on an aesthetic label – so, instead of describing your style as:
‘kinda cottagecore, kinda Y2K’
You might get closer to:
‘I like feminine, romantic pieces with vintage details, unusual accessories, and soft pastel colours.’
That sentence becomes your style compass. You can use it when shopping, styling outfits, creating Pinterest boards or deciding whether something actually belongs in your wardrobe!
8. Build your wardrobe around the patterns
Only after you’ve figured out what you like should you start thinking about filling gaps. Look at your existing wardrobe and ask:
Does what I own reflect what I say I like?
If not, don’t immediately buy twenty new things. Start with the pieces that will allow you to express your style most easily — perhaps a particular skirt silhouette, cardigan, pair of shoes, jewellery style, handbag, etc.
9. Let your style evolve
You’re allowed to change your mind! You may love deep autumnal colours now, but by spring you’re more into pastels. Finding your personal style isn’t about arriving at one perfect aesthetic and never changing it. Your tastes will change. You’ll discover new things. You’ll go through phases. Something you adore now might feel completely wrong in two years!
In Conclusion
Our tastes and preferences can change year to year – even season to season, and that’s fine! What works well is focusing on the common elements and building your wardrobe around that. Don’t go out and buy a whole new wardrobe just because you’re suddenly into leopard print or you now hate all your floral pieces. Try to find ways to make what you have work, whilst incorporating a few new items in one at a time.
I hope this list has helped! Good luck <3